Manliest Man Ever

In case you can't read the above picture very well I'll transcribe it for you.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN GRIZZLY BEAR

JACKSON HOLE, WYOMING

This bear was taken by world famous hunter and hunting guide C. Dale Petersen of Jackson Hole, Wy. It is one of only two Grizzlies known to have been killed "without" the use of modern weaponry.

Verified by Game Biologist, Mr. Peterson killed this bear with his hands, and oddly enough, his teeth. It is known that the bear had been aggravated by a group of backpackers, shortly thereafter Peterson, unaware of previous happenings, came upon the bear. A Fight-to-the-Death ensued. Petersen, having his right hand and arm wedged in the bear's throat, actually used his own teeth and jaws to pinch off the bear's jugular vein. When the bear passed-out from lack of blood flow to the brain, Petersen beat the bear upon the head with a stick.

Now, I've written in the past about what it means to be a man but this guy takes it to a whole new level. I guarantee you that no one in Jackson Hole ever though once about picking a fight with this guy. Sure some stranger probably breezed into town from time to time and found Petersen in the local tavern where people were still buying him drinks for his super human accomplishment. They probably got drunk and wanted to pick a fight with him, but he just bit their jugular till they passed out then clubbed them with a pool cue or something.

Could you imagine sitting around telling stories with this guy?

You: I broke my high school touchdown record my junior year.
Petersen: I killed a Grizzly with my hands.
You: I won a gold medal in the summer Olympics.
Petersen: I killed a Grizzly with my hands.
You: I saved an orphanage from burning down once.
Petersen: Did I tell you about the time I killed the Grizzly... with my hands?

The sad part for you is that his one story is better than anything you could have ever done.

I don't know what Petersen looked like but I bet it was a lot like this.